I promised myself I wasn't going to do another blog post about camp because it was painful enough writing the first one --> http://libbycrawford4.blogspot.com/2013/07/my-time-at-mcnally_3.html I heard "Not About Angels" in The Fault In Our Stars and thought it was gorgeous. It wasn't until I got back from camp and was on a run when it came up on my shuffle. Not really an energizing song, but I liked it enough that I let it play. I almost broke down crying but forced myself to hold it in because no one wants to see someone who's getting exercise cry. It's just awkward and sends a message that physical activity is emotionally distressing (which it almost always is in my case) OK Libby, back to the song! It just made my heart hurt in a way that I had to share.
My blog about McNally Smith's Summer Workshop last year sums up a lot of the same feelings that came with this year's experience. In ways they were pretty similar, but at the same time not. A good amount of stuff can change in a year, including people. I was certainly more ready to be brave enough to chat up kids on the first day and start making "friends." I put quotations around that because I honestly didn't believe that I would get as close to people as I did the previous year. I was so so wrong.
I've seen music work in a lot of beautiful ways, but never have I understood the magnitude of its power to bring people together than I did in the 5 days I was at camp (10 including last year). I want to make a point to reference both because I don't consider one better than the other. Ultimately I received new friends, more confidence, and a renewed love for music and performing with both years, so there's no comparing necessary. What's great though, is that I didn't even have to like the same music as other campers to like them. I asked so many people what they listened to and who their favorite artists were. Probably knew 50% of what/who they answered. I have a deep enough love for music so I've learned to respect it all and not pass judgement. At its core, music is an individual possession to me. I listen to what I want because of how it makes me feel, simple as that. Other campers seemed to relate to me in that way. I don't care if you're a singer, rapper, guitarist, or instrumentalist, you get up on stage and show me you're having a blast or discuss with me what music means to you with passion and light in your eyes, I will cheer you on with an over sized grin.
5 days was not enough. It seems so unfair how easy it is to connect with people and start building worthwhile friendships in less time than that, but suddenly you're brought back to your life that awaits outside of camp. That's why the lines in "Not About Angels" that say "How unfair it's just our luck, found something real that's out of touch" stab me right in the feels. I'm not unhappy with my life away from camp, but I can easily admit that it's hard to be inspired, satisfied, and accepted when you're no longer surrounded by people who value you for your existence, but just your talent. 5 days was never enough for all the singing I wanted to do, for all the acts I wanted to hear at open mic, for all the collaborations I wanted to see come together (and be a part of), for all the deep talks in the dorms I wanted to have, for all the ugly candid snapchats I wanted to see of myself (my username is libster2468 btw), for all the role calls I wanted to endure (I'm kidding, those sucked), for all the minutes I wanted to wait for a damn bagel in the toaster (also kidding about that. I got fed up after the first day and ate it non-toasted), and lastly for all the moments I wanted to take in to remind myself just how lucky I am to be right here, right now.
Birdy sings "What about angels? They will come, they will go and make us special." 5 days was absolutely not enough time with you beautiful human beings. But it was enough time to fill me with unwavering gratitude for having you all make an appearance on my journey. Expect continued support from me for all your music endeavors. Indeed you came and you went, but I can't thank you angels enough for making me feel special. ♥
Here's my cover of Not About Angels: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSnZZAhV5Ag
My Most Treasured Memories
Year 1 *My roommates. 4 girls in one room truly was a blessing in disguise.
* Ray serenading the vocal workshop kids at the piano on our first day
*Seeing the hip hop boys go crazy over Annabelle singing "At Last" at open mic
*Writing a rap with Nina and Eileen
*Watching Kyle dancing on the stairs and buying heels at the mall. What a super kid!
*Managing to sneak boys in our room till 2am. We just talked for hours, no joke.
*Singing Glitter in the Air at final concert.That song gets me every time now.
*Jp's spoken word at open mic
*Being in a recording studio for the first time
Year 2 *I was roomed with a super awesome gal, Erin. You were so laid back and your voice is one of my favorites I've heard up to date.
*Singing Sara Bareilles for the second year in a row for small group numbers
*Witnessing Dirk exclaim "That's the coolest shit I've ever been a part of" after a rehearsal with his newly formed band FUNKNA$TY. The pure enthusiasm on his face reminded me why music is so much fun.
*Hearing Megan and Jacob duet on "The Book of Love" in a practice room. Contacting you two for my wedding!
*Making Amanda sing her audition song (a personal favorite of mine) for us twice. Put that on SoundCloud yo!
*Collin invading Owen's personal space after Owen tried to distract Collin from invading mine. It's the thought that counts buddy!
*Talking with Camille about the future. Regretting not getting your autograph you one of a kind superstar.
*Amanda saying that she loved how much Antonio and I were into music. I have yet to meet someone whose devotion to music is as captivating as his is. Make me playlists bro!
*My theory class. Scott definitely made learning it less of a drag. #TheoryForever
*The hip hop final concert. I had a camcorder in hand for the majority of it but you boys had my lower half groovin' the best it could...that sounds weird.
My blog about McNally Smith's Summer Workshop last year sums up a lot of the same feelings that came with this year's experience. In ways they were pretty similar, but at the same time not. A good amount of stuff can change in a year, including people. I was certainly more ready to be brave enough to chat up kids on the first day and start making "friends." I put quotations around that because I honestly didn't believe that I would get as close to people as I did the previous year. I was so so wrong.
I've seen music work in a lot of beautiful ways, but never have I understood the magnitude of its power to bring people together than I did in the 5 days I was at camp (10 including last year). I want to make a point to reference both because I don't consider one better than the other. Ultimately I received new friends, more confidence, and a renewed love for music and performing with both years, so there's no comparing necessary. What's great though, is that I didn't even have to like the same music as other campers to like them. I asked so many people what they listened to and who their favorite artists were. Probably knew 50% of what/who they answered. I have a deep enough love for music so I've learned to respect it all and not pass judgement. At its core, music is an individual possession to me. I listen to what I want because of how it makes me feel, simple as that. Other campers seemed to relate to me in that way. I don't care if you're a singer, rapper, guitarist, or instrumentalist, you get up on stage and show me you're having a blast or discuss with me what music means to you with passion and light in your eyes, I will cheer you on with an over sized grin.
5 days was not enough. It seems so unfair how easy it is to connect with people and start building worthwhile friendships in less time than that, but suddenly you're brought back to your life that awaits outside of camp. That's why the lines in "Not About Angels" that say "How unfair it's just our luck, found something real that's out of touch" stab me right in the feels. I'm not unhappy with my life away from camp, but I can easily admit that it's hard to be inspired, satisfied, and accepted when you're no longer surrounded by people who value you for your existence, but just your talent. 5 days was never enough for all the singing I wanted to do, for all the acts I wanted to hear at open mic, for all the collaborations I wanted to see come together (and be a part of), for all the deep talks in the dorms I wanted to have, for all the ugly candid snapchats I wanted to see of myself (my username is libster2468 btw), for all the role calls I wanted to endure (I'm kidding, those sucked), for all the minutes I wanted to wait for a damn bagel in the toaster (also kidding about that. I got fed up after the first day and ate it non-toasted), and lastly for all the moments I wanted to take in to remind myself just how lucky I am to be right here, right now.
Birdy sings "What about angels? They will come, they will go and make us special." 5 days was absolutely not enough time with you beautiful human beings. But it was enough time to fill me with unwavering gratitude for having you all make an appearance on my journey. Expect continued support from me for all your music endeavors. Indeed you came and you went, but I can't thank you angels enough for making me feel special. ♥
Here's my cover of Not About Angels: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSnZZAhV5Ag
My Most Treasured Memories
Year 1 *My roommates. 4 girls in one room truly was a blessing in disguise.
* Ray serenading the vocal workshop kids at the piano on our first day
*Seeing the hip hop boys go crazy over Annabelle singing "At Last" at open mic
*Writing a rap with Nina and Eileen
*Watching Kyle dancing on the stairs and buying heels at the mall. What a super kid!
*Managing to sneak boys in our room till 2am. We just talked for hours, no joke.
*Singing Glitter in the Air at final concert.That song gets me every time now.
*Jp's spoken word at open mic
*Being in a recording studio for the first time
Year 2 *I was roomed with a super awesome gal, Erin. You were so laid back and your voice is one of my favorites I've heard up to date.
*Singing Sara Bareilles for the second year in a row for small group numbers
*Witnessing Dirk exclaim "That's the coolest shit I've ever been a part of" after a rehearsal with his newly formed band FUNKNA$TY. The pure enthusiasm on his face reminded me why music is so much fun.
*Hearing Megan and Jacob duet on "The Book of Love" in a practice room. Contacting you two for my wedding!
*Making Amanda sing her audition song (a personal favorite of mine) for us twice. Put that on SoundCloud yo!
*Collin invading Owen's personal space after Owen tried to distract Collin from invading mine. It's the thought that counts buddy!
*Talking with Camille about the future. Regretting not getting your autograph you one of a kind superstar.
*Amanda saying that she loved how much Antonio and I were into music. I have yet to meet someone whose devotion to music is as captivating as his is. Make me playlists bro!
*My theory class. Scott definitely made learning it less of a drag. #TheoryForever
*The hip hop final concert. I had a camcorder in hand for the majority of it but you boys had my lower half groovin' the best it could...that sounds weird.
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