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The Ongoing Stumble

Things people should say to each other more often
  1. You matter.
  2. Your body is not something to apologize for.
  3. If you're doing the best you can, then that's enough.
  4. Cry, just let it out.
  5. I won't judge you for pooping in the bathroom, we all do it.
  6. It's ok to be scared, I am too. 
  7. Thank you.
  8. I say this because I love you—stop doing stupid shit. 
  9. You are deserving of love and happiness.
  10. I am glad you're in my life.
  11. I will believe in you when you don't believe in yourself. 
  12. I'm sorry that I haven't always been there for you.

Things I should say to myself more often
  1. I matter.
  2. My body is not something to apologize for.
  3. I'm doing the best I can, and that's enough.
  4. Cry, just let it out.
  5. Poop in the freaking bathroom, you're a human being.
  6. I am scared and I am not alone.
  7. Thank you.
  8. Stop doing stupid shit.
  9. I am deserving of love and happiness.
  10. I am glad to be alive.
  11. There are others who believe in me even when I don't.
  12. I'm sorry that I have neglected taking care of me.

I struggle with self-love on a daily basis. I consider myself a loving person, but somehow it's a lot harder directing that love inward. Maybe I keep so many people in my heart that I forget who it actually belongs to. And while I'm proud of the relationships that reside in my heart, it's unhealthy to not rent out some space for myself. Going through life waiting for other people to tell you it's ok to feel good about who you are is a long sad road. It's full of doubt, insecurity, and comparison. I can list off three people I love more than myself and the qualities I admire most about them. Funny thing is, those are probably qualities they would use to describe me too.
We live in a society that makes looking in the mirror at your reflection a depressing task. We are told to not take selfies or overshare or brag about our accomplishments. Since when did celebrating one's unique self and journey become something to be ashamed of? Compliment people, share their successes, comfort them through the pain. We could all use a little more love in our lives.  
I'm my worst critic and often the one who stands in the way of my own happiness. It's because I can't recognize the positives in myself that I see in everyone else. I've been dealing with this for a long time and I'm sure I'm not alone. So let's ask ourselves, if we can be such good and supportive presences in our friends' lives, why can't we treat ourselves in the same manner?


     

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